Buttons of Wisdom💜

Life has a way of handing us experiences that shape us, for better or worse. Looking back on my own childhood, I realize that every disappointment, every heartache, has taught me invaluable lessons about resilience, hope, and ultimately, self-worth.

When I was a little girl, I experienced the sting of abandonment early on. I vividly remember being left at a foster home in East Texas where the pine trees grew tall and the chickens roamed free. I remember running barefoot on the pine needles, building forts and imagining my family living together there in the woods. I didn’t need anything but my momma and love. Although the people caring for me were kind and loving, my heart ached for my mom. For an entire year, I held onto hope that she would overcome her struggles with addiction and come back to take care of my siblings and me. And then after a year had passed, she did. I remember her car pulling into the driveway, scattering the chickens. I remember running to the car and jumping into her arms and crying. I remember she was so tired and all she wanted was a nap. I didn’t want to sleep but I would do anything to be next to her so I laid beside her and held on to her as she napped. I was afraid to fall asleep because I was afraid she would leave so I just snuggled close to her and listened as she breathed.

For a time, we were together again in a small apartment. I loved that space; it felt safe. I began first grade there, and one Christmas, the Salvation Army provided us with gifts. It was a bright spot in a dark time.

But then, everything changed. My mom met a man at work who had just been released from prison, and his influence quickly turned destructive. He manipulated her, used our family, and stole what little security we had. My mom’s job and confidence slowly crumbled. We were left bouncing from motels to cars to shelters, and I watched as hope faded from her eyes. This time, I couldn’t help her, no matter how much I believed in her.

Growing up in such a chaotic environment made it hard to understand why my own mother and father couldn’t just choose to change. I went through years of believing the lie that if I wasn’t enough to motivate my own parents to change, then I must be worthless. It took time and a lot of soul-searching to see that their struggles weren’t about me. They were sick, lost in cycles of shame, addiction, fixed mindsets poverty, and pain, and it wasn’t my fault. Every time I visited the hospital after my mother attempted suicide, or stepped into the prison to see my father, it hurt, but it also helped me realize how sick they actually were. It always broke my heart that my mother did not believe in herself and her own abilities to be a single mom to me and my siblings. She couldn’t seem to forgive herself for the trauma she and my father caused. It’s still breaks my heart that both of my brothers are gone forever due to mental illness. I will spend the remainder of my days trying to help biological parents believe in themselves and helping the community have compassion.  

Throughout my 40 years here, I have learned three powerful life lessons that have become part of my resilience and understanding about the world around me. I have spent so much time trying to heal from things out of my control and I wanted to pass it on. Hope it encourages you today.

Lesson 1: The Power of Hope, Even When It Hurts

In all those years of uncertainty, I kept hoping my mom would change. Even after she hurt me, even after the repeated disappointments, I couldn’t stop believing in her. I’ve come to see that hope can be painful, it often requires us to hold out for something we may never get. But hope is also powerful. It helps us see potential where others only see defeat. Choosing to hope, despite the risk of disappointment, has taught me to find light in the darkest places. It’s helped me to see beauty and possibility in people, even when they are struggling or hurting themselves.

Lesson 2: Empathy Is Not Weakness; It’s a Strength

There were times I resented my own compassion. I wished I could turn my back on those who hurt me or become someone tougher, more guarded. But as someone once told me, empathy is one of the things that makes me who I am, a gift rather than a mistake. I may not agree with everyone’s choices, but I believe in their ability to change, if they choose to. Empathy has allowed me to connect with others on a deep level, to understand their stories, and to help them see a way forward, even when the world would rather turn its back on them. Empathy isn’t a weakness; it’s the bridge that brings people closer, that reminds us we’re not alone in our struggles.

Lesson 3: Disappointment Can Be a Teacher in Disguise

The final lesson I’ve learned is that disappointment is as much a part of life as joy. We all go through seasons of waiting, hoping, and believing, only to be let down. Yet it’s in those moments of heartache that I have found strength and wisdom. Disappointment has shown me the bittersweet truth that life isn’t always fair, but that doesn’t mean we’re powerless. We can choose to learn, to grow, and to let every setback refine us. Disappointment has taught me patience, resilience, and a deep inner strength. It has refined me in ways that make me grateful for both the bitter and the sweet moments of life.

As I reflect on these lessons, I’m reminded that life isn’t defined by the pain we endure, but by what we choose to make of it. For every hardship, there has been a lesson. For every setback, an opportunity to grow. And for every disappointment, the chance to cultivate hope. I may not have had control over the hand I was dealt, but I have the power to play it with courage, with empathy, and with resilience.

Through the kindness of others, I’ve learned what it means to truly live, to love, and to hope again. And my greatest wish is to pass on these lessons to remind others that no matter how dark life may seem, there is always light to be found, and strength to be gained, even in the hardest of places.

You never lose your power to choose. Choose wisely.

Recently, I had the honor of sitting on a panel with three other strong and inspiring women, each of whom is passionate about advocacy work. The panel, hosted by the Abilene Police Department Child Advocacy Center, focused on the importance of advocacy for survivors of child abuse. As we answered questions and shared insights, one message remained clear: advocacy is essential for the healing and protection of these children and their families.

Our panel represented a variety of perspectives, but we all shared the same goal to be the voice for those who have survived abuse and to ensure their stories are heard. For me, it was an especially moving experience, as I have survived it, walked alongside many young people in their journeys of healing, and I have become a community advocate. Every child deserves a chance to feel safe, supported, and valued, and the role of an advocate is to help make that possible.

One of the most important things we can do for both children and adults who have experienced abuse is to empowering them. Whether it’s providing resources, standing up in court, or simply offering a listening ear, advocates have the power to change lives. Each person in the room had a vital role to play, and I hope they walked away realizing how important their work truly is.

I want to extend my deepest gratitude to the Abilene Police Department for organizing this event and for valuing our voices as advocates. Their commitment to protecting children and supporting survivors shines brightly through their efforts. It was an honor to be part of this conversation, and I look forward to continuing to work alongside such dedicated individuals.

As we move forward, let us remember that advocacy is not just a job or a title; it’s a calling. Together, we can make a profound difference in the lives of children who need us most.

Thank you, Abilene Police Department Child Advocacy Center, for your kindness and for reminding us all of the importance of what we do from the small tasks like making calls to the bigger tasks of being present in Court.

🩷 Always & Forever Stephanie Ellison

There’s something deeply powerful about cheering for other women to succeed. When we celebrate one another, we uplift not only our friends but also ourselves. Today, I’m reflecting on one of the most cherished friendships in my life the friendship I’ve shared with Katie Martinez and the beautiful journey we’ve walked together.

A few decades ago, I met Katie, and even then, I knew she was special. We didn’t just connect; we bonded over our dreams, our aspirations, and our faith. Katie had dreams of making her mark in the fashion world, while I dreamed of using my story to impact lives across the nation and beyond. Even though our paths were different, we prayed for one another, knowing that God had big plans for both of us.

Those early days of dreaming together feel like a lifetime ago, but they were just the beginning of the incredible journeys we’ve been on. Over the years, Katie and I stayed connected as much as we could through prayers, check-ins, and cheering from afar. Today, as I pause to reflect, I’m overwhelmed with gratitude for how our dreams have unfolded.

This year alone, I’ve had the privilege of traveling to 15 states, sharing my story with thousands of youth, educators, advocates, and nonprofit leaders. My work with IMPACTtruth, Inc. has allowed me to live out my purpose in ways I never imagined, and I am deeply fulfilled by the difference I’ve been able to make. The road hasn’t always been easy, but I am so thankful for every challenge, every triumph, and every moment that brought me to where I am today.

But this post isn’t just about my journey it’s about the incredible woman I have the honor of calling my friend. 🎉🤯🙏🏼🙌🏻❤️ Katie just wrapped up New York Fashion Week, and not only that, she had her OWN RUNWAY SHOW! I am so proud of her that I can barely contain it. Watching her dedication, creativity, and passion unfold into something so magnificent has been nothing short of inspiring. Katie’s success isn’t just a testament to her talent, but also to her perseverance and her heart. She didn’t let the struggles stop her. She didn’t give up when the road got tough. She pressed on, and now, she’s standing at the pinnacle of her career, showing the world just what she’s made of.

Katie, my heart is bursting with pride for you. I wear your clothing with pride and joy, knowing the hands that designed them and the heart that sewed them into existence. I will never stop cheering for you, and I will never stop praying for your continued success. You are a force in this world, and I’m honored to walk this journey of life with you by my side.

To every woman reading this: let’s be each other’s biggest cheerleaders. Let’s stand in the gap for one another, praying, encouraging, and lifting each other up. There is room for all of us to succeed, and when one of us rises, we all rise. Whether your friend is chasing a career, starting a new chapter, or simply navigating life, be her biggest fan. Cheer for her like you would cheer for yourself.

The world needs more women who are willing to stand behind one another, who aren’t afraid to share the spotlight, and who believe in the power of community over competition. Today, let’s commit to celebrating the victories of the women in our lives, no matter how big or small. Because when we cheer for other women to succeed, we all win.

Katie, I am cheering for you with all my heart. Keep shining, keep thriving, and know that your journey is inspiring more people than you could ever imagine. I am so proud of you, and I will always be in your corner, praying for your continued success. 💫

Key Takeaways:

• Celebrate the successes of the women around you. Their victories don’t diminish your own.
• Support your friends in their unique journeys, even if their paths look different from yours.
• There is incredible power in prayer, community, and cheering each other on.

Let’s commit to being women who rise by lifting others. Let’s be the kind of friends who don’t just dream for ourselves but for each other too. Because together, we are unstoppable. 🌟

Check out her work at http://www.Elegantees.com

#DreamBig #FaithInAction #ProudFriendMoment #FashionBoss #KeepPraying #WomenSupportingWomen #GratefulJourney #ReflectAndShine #ImpactLives #NYFW2024 #KeepGoing #GodIsGood 🙏✨🙌💫

There was a time when I would have done anything to avoid the heartache, the nights filled with anguish, and the endless valleys of despair. But now, I see those moments as gifts.

The lessons I’ve learned through the deserts of my life have transformed the way I love, the way I give, and the way I see the world. Without those hardships, I wouldn’t have the depth of appreciation I carry today for the little joys life offers. I’ve learned to hold gratitude close, to value love and peace above all else, and to understand that we can’t truly see the beauty of the light without first walking through darkness. 🌅💛

Although life can be incredibly hard at times, these trials teach us lessons of light, community, and resilience. It’s in the hardest moments that we learn how to cherish the sweet, simple joys that would otherwise go unnoticed. 🌻✨

In case you need it, here are a few practical ways to see the sweet joys of life from heartache:

1. Pause and Reflect🧘‍♀️ – Take a moment each day to reflect on what you’re grateful for, no matter how small. These moments of gratitude help shift our perspective from what’s missing to what we have.
2. Seek Connection🤝 – In times of heartache, lean into your community. Whether it’s friends, family, or a support group, sharing your experiences helps bring light into dark places.
3. Embrace the Journey 🛤️ – Understand that life’s challenges are part of a bigger story. Trust that every valley you pass through is shaping you, helping you grow stronger, and revealing deeper joy.

Love,
Stephanie

#GratitudeInTheHardTimes #TurningPainIntoPurpose #SweetSideOfBitter #Resilience #JoyInTheJourney

❤️
Some things are in our control. Some are not. One thing that IS in our control is how we communicate with the world around us.

If life is tough for you right now, keep pushing! There are beautiful life lessons to be learned by the heavy burdens we traverse through. Think of these burdens as weights that, though they may seem heavy now, will eventually build the muscles of your character. I believe in you and your ability to become strong, brave, confident, and kind. Your life has purpose, and you are significant! You are loved! I hope you know you are loved so very deeply!

If your life is amazing, you, my friends, are like lighthouses, guiding others through the fog of their struggles. You have so much to offer! Look for people who are down and lift them up as if you are giving them wings to soar. Look for people to speak life into, smile and laugh with, share a hug with, or bless them with a meal, like planting seeds of joy that will bloom in their hearts.

Love your neighbor. The ones in your city, state, country, and world!

You are loved!
Always & Forever!
Steph

Someone is inspired! 🫶🏻💕. The Nostalgia I felt watching my kiddo be inspired by the Olympics tonight is simply moving! I remembered childhood moments I hadn’t thought about in decades! Goodness I’m aging 😂! I just said decades, PLURAL!!! 🤯.

I will have you know, when I was a little girl, I was going to be the first Olympic Mermaid swimmer, gymnast, and figure skater, all at one time! Oh and I would also be positioning myself to sing for the opening ceremonies 🤞🏼! Those wild dreams kept me in my imagination and out of the chaos of my life at the time. 💕. I LOVE THE OLYMPICS!

❤️❤️❤️🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
To all of the kids from tough spaces,

I know things can feel really tough sometimes, and it might seem like there’s no way out. When I was your age, life was so difficult. I wanted to share something that helped me? Watching the Olympics. 🌟 Even though I wasn’t an athlete, seeing people from all over the world giving their all and chasing their dreams inspired me so much. Everytime a person/athlete from our country won a medal or lost, I felt it with them!

The Olympics showed me that with hard work, dedication, and a big heart, you can achieve amazing things even if you start in a place that feels hopeless. It’s like seeing the whole world come together to celebrate how awesome we can be when we try our best. 🥇I even had the opportunity to meet a real Olympian, Mia Hamm at one of the High Schools I attended!

I truly believe every child should have the chance to watch the Olympics. It’s more than just sports; it’s about seeing people who never give up, even when things are hard. It always reminded me that I could dream big too, and that there’s always hope, no matter where you start. Some of the athletes have stories just like ours!

So keep dreaming, keep believing in yourself, and remember that you’re capable of amazing things! 🌍💖

Love Steph (a different kind of Olympian…the mermaid kind) 😉

NeverGiveUp #DreamBig #OlympicInspiration #YouAreStrong

IMPACTtruth

Have you ever been told you can’t participate in something because it’s only intended for the elite members of society with deep pockets and rich family histories? I was in fact told this just the other day.😳 After sharing a dream of mine and hearing this loud message I slowly walked to my car feeling defeated and drove around the city I love, crying and wrestling with where I came from. As much as it stings, it’s not new for me. I desire to be a difference maker but how? Give up? Never! I don’t allow myself to stay in those mental spaces for too long.

After this conversation, I have found myself caught in the “in-between,” the space where dreams both big and small seem incredibly real and impossibly distant. So many of my moments in life have been spent believing that I couldn’t possibly achieve my dreams or goals because I wasn’t born into a family considered to be “well off” or with a legacy name.

I am constantly battling the stigmas and barriers from growing up in trauma and hard places like government-funded housing, trailer parks, homelessness, foster care, and feelings of being unqualified for greatness. I constantly have to be reminded that true wealth isn’t always measured by the name, dollars, or material possessions. It’s measured by the richness of our experiences, the depth of our compassion, and the strength of our resilience and character. Despite the chaos and instability of my life, I have discovered a reservoir of hope within myself, a flickering light that refuses to be extinguished by those who fail to see the value of this candle light within me when compared to the beautiful community of socialites among us.

I believe our society often forgets that our financially wealthy neighbors, those deemed, deep-pocket socialites, might feel used or targeted for their resources. I have heard it can be equally lonely to be used by society even for a good cause because it’s hard to decipher who just wants into your pockets and who wants connection to your true authentic self. While our philanthropic community and their support can be crucial, the approach matters. They too desire genuine connections and meaningful contributions, not just being seen as a means to an end.

My “family” consists of ALL of those “in-between”! 💕 Collectively, we have raised millions of dollars by “crowdfunding” for various causes. Our success is a testament to the power of community and shared purpose. It shows that even without a prestigious background, we can achieve extraordinary things by coming together and leveraging our collective strength and resilience.

I have a significant desire to tell every child, every person caught in the in-between, that your background does not define your future. The world needs your unique voice, your story, your passion. Your experiences have given you a perspective that can inspire, heal, and bring about change.

Yes, the road may be tough. There will always be people who do not see your value because their narrative about legacy and worth is skewed. But remember, your worth is not determined by a bank account, or the prestige of your career, or even the name of your father or mother’s father. It’s determined by the goodness YOU bring into the world, the lives YOU touch, and the hope YOU ignite in others.

Keep pushing forward. Believe in your dreams. Know that you are enough, just as you are, even if your birth father is incarcerated, or your biological mother battles addiction, or you’re still toting the poverty lines. I truly believe we can create a world where EVERY CHILD/ADULT, no matter their background, can see the possibilities within themselves and dare to reach for them. Every person can be seen as valuable.

I DON’T SEE DEEP POCKETS OR NO POCKETS. I SEE HUMANS CAPABLE OF MAKING A DIFFERENCE TOGETHER! EVERY PENNY IS IMPORTANT. Our 100% may be different but it all holds value.

I hold a “my father is a King” mentality!

🗣️GIVE IT THREE MONTHS:

My Confirmation Bias: looking for evidence that “those people” are against me.

There was a time when I believed I was the person no one would want to sit with in church. I pushed everyone away, convinced that they were judging me. I rarely stepped out to get help, which lead to me feeling isolated and unworthy.

But then, I met “them”. I met incredible people along this journey who changed everything for me. They broke through my walls and made me feel seen, accepted, safe and loved. So many people have sat next to me so that I wouldn’t be alone.

What if I had let my fear of judgment keep me from these life changing connections? What if I am the reason for my own isolation because I only searched for evidence that supported my unhealthy beliefs? What about the times I missed “them” because of my inability to accept the love, compassion, and mercy of others?

I have learned to rest in the mercy, compassion, and kindness of others. Interestingly enough, most of the people who have offered support have been professing Christians. Some have been humanists, and others were simply empathetic activists who have walked a similar path. No matter what, I have learned to lean into gratitude for their encouragement along the way.

Have you ever considered that Christians, Humanists, and Activists all belong in the category of Mentor? Mentors offer a nonjudgmental presence and wisdom from their own journey to those who need it.

To anyone experiencing loneliness, mental battles, and isolation, or simply trying to figure out how to break some devastating and often debilitating generational cycles: You are not alone, even if it feels that way. Often, the people around you want to support you, even if you don’t see it yet. Don’t wait for the invitation, walk into the room. Step out of the shadows and let yourself be seen. You are worthy of connection and love.

Have you recognized those who are there for you? They might be sitting quietly by your side within the walls of the church, waiting for you to open up when the time is right. Sometimes, all it takes is one small step, one brave moment of reaching out or speaking up. You’ll find that there are people ready to offer you the same mercy, compassion, and kindness that I found.

Your journey towards healing and connection starts with believing that you are worthy of it. You don’t have to fight your battles alone. There are mentors, friends, and kind-hearted strangers who are more than willing to walk with you. Embrace their support and let it uplift you. Your story is important, and your presence matters.

I also want to tell you that I have walked through the doors of many churches and have often been the judgmental one in the past. I think it may have been because of the crippling fear of perceived rejection. I have also been humbled and incredibly honored to watch the walls around my heart and mind crumble as peace and freedom enter in by way of unconditional love.

If you are in a season of despair…please know there are people who care, everywhere. Maybe you need to believe it in order to see it.

What if your next step towards connection is just around the corner? What if reaching out could change everything for you, as it did for me?

-Stephanie Ellison

P.S. I remember walking into my church and saying “Nope! It’s not for me!” Then I felt a nudge within saying “give it three months”! I stayed for three months and I started to feel the connections! It was truly remarkable. To think I almost walked away after the first visit. I truly would have missed out on so much due to my own judgmental inner dialogue! Give it three months is my rule for life!

Numb or Navigate:
🌟I am proud of the girl in the picture.

🏠 In the dark corners of a broken home, I often felt alone even while surrounded by people. During the fighting, hitting, and piercing screams, I would hide with hope and imagine I was in a different environment, one with more peace than pain. My childhood was rough, moving from place to place, most times without a real bed or even a familiar face.

Unlike many in my family of origin, I chose not to turn to drugs or alcohol for relief despite the heaviness of the chaos. Instead, I faced it all directly, finding my strength in moments of uncertainty and grief. 💪🏼

💔My two amazing brothers, found themselves caught in the throes of addiction many times, using substances to numb their pain. The pain from trauma can cause more trauma and it can becomes too much to bear. I always understood their reasons for numbing and have had compassion for them. Tragically, both of their lives were cut short, their struggles highlighting the devastating impact of running and numbing rather than facing the inner turmoil and finding healthy ways to cope. They are forever missed and never forgotten. To this day and forevermore my spirit fractured by their absence but the absence fuels my fire and desire to rebuke unhealthy acts of numbing.

✍🏼Over the years I started writing, expressing my genuine feelings and experiences. I have found that validation and healing in the art of written expression has been tremendously beneficial. Year after year, I have found my voice by making conscious choices in the midst of my struggles. I often bare my soul through pen and paper writing in journals, on the back of receipts, on post-it’s or anything I can find, to get it out of my mind, of course it’s 2024 so stroking the keys on a keyboard help as well. Words have become a refuge and a gift to the healing process.

📸Photography has been an indispensable part of my healing process as well. In a life often marked by chaos and uncertainty, capturing images became a way to pause and appreciate moments of beauty and peace amidst the turmoil. Through my camera lens, I have learned to focus on the details that often go unnoticed the gentle curve of a leaf, the play of light on water, the quiet dignity of a weathered face. This practice not only provided me with a literal new perspective but also a metaphorical one, teaching me to find serenity in my surroundings and to seek out the beauty that persists even in difficult times. It’s through this artistic expression that I’ve been able to connect more deeply with the world around me, transforming how I perceive my environment and my place within it.

🏃🏽‍♀️Exercise has been a critical component of coping, serving as more than just a means to physical health. Engaging in activities like CrossFit, walking, and running has provided a powerful outlet for emotional release and mental clarity. The physical effort required in these activities forces me to focus on my body’s movements and breathing, diverting attention away from stressful thoughts and allowing a mental break from the pressures of life.

The rhythmic nature of walking and running, coupled with the disciplined challenge of lifting weights, acts as a form of meditation. Each step and lift is a momentary escape, grounding me in the present and diminishing feelings of anxiety and depression. This physical exertion releases endorphins, often referred to as feel good hormones, which naturally elevate mood and promote a sense of wellbeing. I’m no Olympian, I’m just trying to survive.

The regular routine of exercise instills a sense of accomplishment and control. By setting and achieving fitness goals, I am reminded of my strength and resilience, reinforcing my ability to manage life’s challenges. This has been invaluable in not just maintaining my physical stamina (not to perfection), but in fortifying my mental resilience, helping me navigate and manage emotional turmoil more effectively.

🙏🏼Throughout this journey, my faith has also been a deeply personal cornerstone of my healing. It has provided a sense of hope, community, and purpose amidst the darkness, guiding me towards forgiveness and peace. This relationship has grown stronger as I have learned to trust in a path that often seemed obscured by my circumstances. This spiritual grounding has been essential, offering me a deeper source of strength and resilience.

🧘‍♀️While dealing with the aftermath of years of trauma it has been hard to find my footing and I have certainly not been free of stumbling blocks along the way. My brain has struggled to understand that I could be safe, loved, wanted, and at peace. Truthfully there have been many moments that I wished for the light of my soul to burn out. I have pressed on. With each moment of difficulty, I have learned that every slow breath I breathed, while my heart raced to the brink of explosion, has helped me learn to trust that safety can be found in this new chapter of my life. Breathe in for four seconds, hold four seconds, exhale four seconds, hold four seconds and repeat.

✨Today, my light inside shines brighter and I have emerged from the shadows into a strong woman and advocate. I now have the honor of sharing a brighter hope filled life for anyone who has come from hard and dark places. I am a speaker and an author who no longer wears only black to match the shadows of my past, I often wear bright pink 💖. This strong color was chosen to express the voice I have found. A voice that is here to stay and it has become a vessel for reaching out to help others just as many have done for me.

With the compassionate help of many members of my community and years of hard work, I have built my life as a wife, a mother, a mentor, and a friend. I finally believe it is possible to find joy and to experience triumph. The first 17 years of my painful introduction into humanity has made a direct impact on my heart for helping people. It has shaped me, refined me and challenged me to fight to live.

👷‍♀️Through all of the wrestling, sleepless nights, tears, wishing, hoping, dreaming, and heartache, I have chosen not to seek to numb the pain with quick fixes. Instead, I have pressed through it all, allowing each challenge to strengthen and refine me. I’m still here and I’m grateful for writing, photography, exercise, community and faith. My journey shows that even through the darkest nights, with resilience, a hand up, and determination, it’s possible to reach the light. My hope is that my life will be a testament to the power of facing our struggles head on while asking for and receiving help along the way. ❤️

IMPACTtruth #mentalhealth #LoveChallenge #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth IMPACTtruth, Inc.