There’s something deeply unsettling about people who use their position, influence, or authority, not to serve, but to control.

I’ve lived through this as a child suffering from abuse and as an adult in various situations. I’ve felt that ache in my chest when someone tried to make me question my worth because I wouldn’t bend to their pressure. I’ve set healthy, needed, soul-protecting boundaries, and watched as someone who once smiled when they interacted with me but turned cold because I didn’t give in.

That’s not love. That’s not leadership. That’s not okay.

If someone only values you when you’re easy to control, their acceptance was never real. If honoring peace in your own life turns you into their enemy, they were never rooting for you they were using you.

Let me say this clearly: you are not wrong for saying no. You are not wrong for needing space. You are not wrong for choosing your mental health, your family, your faith, or your peace.

Power and control can be used like poison, quiet, subtle, and destructive. When someone tries to manipulate you with guilt, fear, or influence, they’re not protecting the relationship… they’re protecting their ability to control it.

But you don’t have to stay.

It’s okay to walk away from situations where you’re being emotionally cornered. It’s okay to take a break from people who don’t respect your boundaries. It’s okay to love someone or the work their company does and still say, “This is not safe for me anymore.”

Yes, it may benefit them if you stay. But that doesn’t mean it’s what’s best for you.

You matter. Your peace matters. Your boundaries matter.

If standing your ground costs you their approval, it’s still worth it. Because peace that comes at the cost of your dignity isn’t peace at all.

Let them be uncomfortable with your boundaries. That’s their work to do. You? You just keep healing. Keep growing. Keep walking in truth.

You are not too much. You are not selfish. You are not the villain for protecting yourself.

You’re just someone who finally decided to stop shrinking for the comfort of others.

That’s not weakness. That’s strength. That’s the kind of power that sets people free, not controls them.

Wish them well and let them be.

💕Steph
Simply Encourage Blog