TRIGGER WARNING

Today is my brother’s birthday. He was born in 1983 and lived until 2020. He was born during an ice storm at home because the ambulance couldn’t get to them in time. He was beautiful and full of life. He had ADHD so his attention was shared with the world spontaneously. He was messy and beautifully unorganized and his gifts were found in music, creative carpentry, and making people laugh. Goodness, he could sing and his voice sounded like Randy Travis. I so wish I had a recording of him singing to share with you today!

In honor of my brother, I have a few things I would like to ask. Pick one or all, I do not care, I would love to see sibling love today!

♥️If you have a brother could you do me a favor and call them today just to say I love you…even if you have been fighting…even if you haven’t been close lately. Do not let another day go by without saying I love you. (one day you may not have them) Share it with me if you feel lead. Be silly or sweet or both! JUST CONNECT!

♥️Comment with a picture of your sibling!

♥️If your sibling has passed away, tell me about them! Share anything you want!

♥️If you are a parent, tell me your favorite sibling story about your children! Make me laugh, cry, or both!

❤️Go look at the bright star tonight and remember to look for light in the world rather than focusing on the darkness.

Losing Shawn in March was a nightmare. Celebrating his life today feels bittersweet. Life just isn’t fair and although I know this I cannot help but feel the pain of today.

I decided after Shawn died this year that I wanted to include both him and Daniel in my Children’s book. In my moments of self-loathing, I have said, why? How did lightning strike twice and how in the world did I lose both of my brothers tragically? Why??? I may never get an answer on this side of heaven but I can choose to keep their memory alive in the life that I have left on earth.

I was not planning to share this with the world but I have decided to share it today in honor of him. I am sharing one of the pictures from my children’s book with you. This is a picture of both of my brothers at the zoo. I am happy when I imagine them together. My oldest brother Daniel is holding Shawn on his shoulders. Daniel was like a dad to us since our dad was incarcerated for most of our lives. The elephant is symbolic for “the elephant never forgets” just as I will never forget them. There is a little heart on the fence and that represents love is always around and although it is not always felt in moments of great inner turmoil, there is always someone who loves you even in your darkest times.

Daniel died in 2006 by suicide. Shawn tragically died in March while battling addiction. I hate that they are gone and I miss them terribly. Today, I want YOU to know that you are not alone. If you struggle with depression or mental illness please get help. There is no shame in reaching out. NONE! Do not try to numb the pain with drugs or alcohol. I have the suicide hotline in my phone for those dark moments of my life when I feel isolated or alone and I am not ashamed. Here add this to yours and share as needed for you or for others 800-273-8255. I see a counselor and I am not ashamed. I used to be embarrassed but I am not anymore! There is no discrimination when discussing mental illness, it can hit us all. We could ALL use mental health days and practice self-care. Take care of yourself and your babies. Reach out to your siblings and make sure they are okay.

Happy Birthday, Shawn! I pray this post honors you and Daniel. I love you and miss you. I will be out looking at the bright star tonight and hope to see the beautiful light in the darkness.

In honor of my brother’s birthday, I have added my book to Amazon Kindle and TODAY is the release date. I am sharing your face with the world today in hopes that people would bond with those they love and nurture the greatness in them.